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A failed night of the rumpty-tumpty
You'd think I just sketched out a new HBO mini-series. Rolled up cheetos over an unwarranted and uncared about Monpoly board sitting idle next to an open bottle of KY, sadly after three and a half attempts of the rumpty-… -
No nookie tonight
Wow, some asshat must have stolen a five-dollar bill right out of your back khaki pocket (along with a professional balloon clown looping your underwear into several knots before slipping them back down your pants) or so… -
Being horizontal means you can't be vertical
I think of myself as a reasonably good person. I recycle, granted not too much since the the cost of being reusably responsible far exceeds my knee-jerk response to fill up my beer cans with water first so they sink out … -
The most embarrassing moment of my life
(Y'all can thank Antisoccermom for this bombshell. We were talking last night over live video about the "most embarrassing moments in our lives" and she asked me to share mine. While my life is a soap opera, this takes t… -
The smoking gun
Just like a midget standing next to the urinal, some days its everything I can do just to keep on my toes...particularly when taking care of a sick little baby (particularly when that sick baby is my husband). No, I’m no… -
I now prounced you dude and dude
A young priest, on his first trip to church, walked out of the library with wide eyes and proclaimed … -
No sex allowed?
There's nothing worse than someone practically sticking their fingers into your ovaries and poking around enough that MapQuest could produce a reasonable roadmap for your girlie bits, particularly when you've been smeare… -
Virginity: coloring me as the bitch
Three weeks of starving myself and twenty minutes of laying on the bed grunting like a horny freshman later, all in the intense hope of successfully worming my way into some extremely tight Baroness from GI Joe leather p… -
Dude for a day
It was sometime during our an insanely fun night of boozy karaoke along with the oblitigory all-you-can-shovel-in-your-Princess-butt-labeled-track-pants Chinese buffet dinner that my friend Anna, otherwise known as my in… -
Sex, as quized by an 11-year old
Not another quiz. My goodness, you'd think some folks had nothing better to do than fill yet another mindless sex quiz written by a myopic eleven-year old girl who just got felt up for the first time and wanted to share …
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Fix it like a girl!
So I had an old Handspring Visor Edge laying aroun... -
Bad Blogging 101
Clearly my blogging rhythm seems to have been drop... -
Blogging without words
&n...
